2009 in short

Being sick on Christmas Day is not my preferred way of celebrating Jesus' birth. I missed not only Christmas service but also an outing with my younger sister and my cousins. I wanted to pen a reflective blog entry on Christmas Day and hopefully I can, even with an upset stomach. I was wondering how best to do this and decided to reflect on some important aspects of my life:


Friends/Family: What would I do without friends and family? I just want to thank God for giving me a family (plus extended ones) who have loved me so abundantly that I could give so generously to others. I also want to thank God for my friends - the many dashes of colour in my sometime-monochrome life.


Career: I work for the glory of God and He calls for excellence from me. Excellence, not perfection. I want to thank God for a job that gives me the time and the finances towards Godly purposes.


Money: I have not been as careful a steward of God's money as I would have liked to. I'm thankful that I am able to channel some money towards needy children regularly. I want to give underprivileged or poor children a good start in life through education so that they and their family can get out of the poverty trap. God has impressed on me the number of children He wants me to help with as well as the giving of an annual offering to my favourite charity - World Vision. Supporting needy children is one of my life's passions.


Romance/Significant other: One of my dear friends left me speechless when she said I could never love or marry a person if he doesn't love God as much as I do. I was stunned because she was so right. The love of my life is Christ.


Spiritual Growth: I thank God that He's been faithful to me even though I've not been very disciplined in my prayer life or my quiet time this year. I got a lot out of YWAM's introduction to discipleship training school course, which I attended for 12 Saturdays this year.

God has shown me time and again that my gifts are in the areas of the three Es - Encouraging, Edifying and Empowering people. He has also laid on my heart that a woman after God's own heart is a woman of prayer.

I feel that God is leading me to focus on prayer in the coming year, and that I am first and foremost to be a God-chaser before I can be a people-chaser for Him. He also impressed very deeply on me that in ministry, I cannot give what I do not have and so I must always draw from my source, which is Christ, and I must always be sensitive to the Holy Spirit and follow His leading. This means an added urgency for me to be disciplined in my quiet time so that I can grow closer in my relationship with God.

I'm currently reading Warren W.Wiersbe's On Being a Servant of God and my auntie just gave me a daily devotional journal on Power Prayers for Women as a Christmas gift.


Personal Growth: Someone once remarked that when it comes to developing relationships with people, I've got a very broad moat around me - this is true because there are very few people I would let into my inner circle of trust. Through 2009, this moat has shrunk in size although it's still there. I think I still need to work a lot on being more other-focused than me-focused.

Developing more meaningful relationships with others is one of my key goals because that will be the fruit of my relationship with God in 2010.


Ministry: One of the most painful lessons this year has been the fact that suspicion rather than gratitude often emerges when one tries to help others. That the other's response is sometimes "why is she doing this?" and "what will she get out of this?".

I grappled with this a lot and I asked God why this attitude was so prevalent. His reply was that this was an attitude borne out of being in the world system. Many a times, I was sorely tempted to join the crowd and not even bother to go the extra mile without any benefit to myself, but thank God, the Holy Spirit lives in me and corrects me by saying: "Do you belong to the Kingdom of God or are you still stuck in the world system?"

It still hurts me a lot when people think that I'm helping them because I stand to benefit in some way or I've a hidden agenda. What comforts me is that God is watching and He knows my heart.

I thank God that He knows I need only these few but meaningful words that always let me know that I'm doing what He has called me to do - "thank you for being there" and "thank you for lending a listening ear when I needed one".


Highlights of 2009:

- My cousin and her daughter's visit

- My sister's graduation

- Watching Liverpool live

- A counsellors' retreat

- A trip to Ho Chi Minh with a friend

- A trip to Israel to attend a friend's wedding and to catch up with another

- Brunches, lunches, teas and dinners with friends

- The many concerts I attended during the year

- One of my dear friends giving birth to a daughter

- One of my dear friends getting engaged

- Attending YWAM's IDTS course

Finally, may God find me faithful. Amen.